Unhandled Exceptions

An old one but always brings a smile….

Heaven is where the police are British, the chefs are French, the mechanics are German, the lovers Italian and it is all organised by the Swiss.

Hell is where the police are German, the chefs British, the mechanics French, the lovers Swiss and it is all organized by the Italians.

Reminded of this by… —http://twitter.com/guibert/status/128171524673912832

Genki Sushi and Japanese Tapas

Stellenbosch has been hiding Genki from me. Apparently the sushi chef from the Tank in the Cape Quarter now owns and runs Genki in Stellenbosch. Wow.
If you like sushi, go! Yes, it is that good.

Today’s Random Pathetic Spam Sample

Some more #hilarious spam I received today.   So you’re going to send me $7.3m USD for no reason at all!  Great!  Where do i sign up …  #fail

I am Dr.Mark Allen Director World Fund Management. I decided to contact you because of the prevailing financial report reaching my office and the intense nature of polity in London. This is to inform you about our plan to send your fund to you via cash delivery system this system will be easier for you and for us. We are going to send your payment of US$7.3 Million to you via courier service. I have secured every needed document to cover this fund.Note: This fund is coming in 2 security proof boxes which are sealed with Synthetic nylon seal and padded with machine. I will use my position to release this fund to you. The boxes are coming with a Courier agent who will deliver them to you at your home address.All you need to do now is to send to me:1. Name in full:.2. Address:……3. Nationality:..4. Age/Sex :…..5. Occupation:…6. Phone/Fax:….7. Country:……Note: The Agent does not know the contents in these boxes, the content was declared to him as Sensitive Photographic Film Materials.I will secure the clearance Certificate that will be tagged on the boxes which I will dispatch along with the security inner Keys of the consignments to enable you access them as soon as they are delivered to you.Best Regards,Dr.Mark Allen+44xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx@yahoo.co.jp

Thoughts from row 32

riding the bus in the sky (SAA636) from joburg to cape town tonight, I found myself in 32d. There are only 32 rows. d is on the aisle which places it closer to the toilets than any other seat. Yay!

After two hours of increasingly smelly flying, we finally bounced to a landing in a foggy mother city. Once on the ground at the gate, a guy of some considerable girth decided he needed one more potty break. We were on the ground !! I stood between him and one more vacuum- assisted flush. Feeling a bit grumpy at this point, I chirped “you can’t wait 2 mins until we offload?”. His sarcastic response was ” no, I can’t actually…” with loads of sarcasm, followed by “a$$hole” muttered under his breath as he locked himself in for some more cubicle fun.

When he exited a couple mins later, he found me once again blocking his path to his seat. After a half-hearted “excuse me”, I said ” you can wait where you are until we all get out of our seats”. He protested a bit asking incredulously, “because I went to the toilet??”. “no”, I replied, “it’s because you called me an a$$hole. If you apologize, I will let you past”.

He decided aloud that he wouldn’t be apologizing, and I didn’t let him past.

Childish on my part? Probably…

Satisfying? Immensely….

Why PlayMoreGolf will be losing me as a customer…

I joined PMG in December, 2010 on their unlimited golf package.   The offer of unlimited rounds of golf, for R399 a month seemed to good to be true.   It turns out, that what ‘unlimited rounds of golf’ actually means is:

• You need to book at least a week in advance for a tee time on a Sunday
• Tee times are available in inverse proportion to the popularity of the golf club in question
• Golf clubs appear to be booking their last one or two slots for the afternoon as PMG tee times (Devonvale, Milnerton, etc) 
• Prepare to be treated as a second-class citizen when you rock up to play

The final straws, so to speak, are twofold.   First, I got an email this week from PMG indicating that they would no longer be offering unlimited golf.  Instead, unlimited now means only 4 rounds per month!. 

Next, on Sunday at Devonvale, I had a 2pm tee time, and I was behind a fourball, also PMG ‘members’.   They proceeded to take over an hour to play the first 3 holes, and when I politely walked the length of the 13th par-3 as they putted out to ask them why things were so slow … were extremely rude.   There was a whole hole open ahead of them, and they weren’t prepared to let me play through.  I ended up walking off the course and reporting them to club management who suggested that ‘this is a regular thing with PMG members’. 

So, I’ve done the math, and for very little more per month, I can become a full member at Kuilsriver or Devonvale golf clubs.   I can play when I like, within reason, and be a full member of a club with all the associated social and other benefits that come along from that.   Most importantly, I can hopefully avoid the taint of being lumped in as ‘one of those PMG guys’ when playing a round.   

PMG needs to remember that golf is a social game as much as anything else, and if they associate themselves with 2nd-class citizenship in the golfing world, along with attracting cheapskates who don’t know the game and take 6 hours to play 18 holes, they will lose customers like me.